Tea and chaos

Sometimes life throws me an in-too-deep moment, where my illusions of being a rational, sensible being in control of my own life are overpowered by chaos.

My day so far:

  • arrive at office luxuriating in the thought of the cup of coffee I am going to make
  • find there is no coffee left
  • curse gently
  • make tea
  • go to desk
  • begin work on fiddly data cleaning job
  • feel intense frustration at fiddly data cleaning job
  • push papers to one side with annoyance at their fiddliness
  • in process, sweep cup of tea over, filling keyboard with tea
  • curse liberally while draining keyboard onto desk
  • curse liberally while mopping up tea
  • feel pleased that I bought a good quality keyboard with mechanical switches and removable keycaps
  • dig out keycap remover
  • pull off all keys
  • mop up tea
  • feel appalled by mixture of skin, beard hairs and sandwich crumbs residing within the keyboard
  • fetch Henry the hoover
  • hoover remaining detritus from keyboard
  • think while I hoover that I have left the keys a bit close to the keyboard on the desk
  • as this thought crosses my mind, hoover up three keys
  • curse liberally
  • curse liberally
  • curse liberally
  • tear off Henry the hoover’s head
  • fish around in Henry’s stomach for 10 minutes retrieving three keys from his dusty¬†innards
  • mop up the remaining tea in the keyboard
  • replace the keys from memory
  • plug in the keyboard
  • make a replacement cup of tea
  • spill it in my lap

Can I go home now, please?

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